I'm a 26 year old paraplegic lady and having a weak bladder is the worst thing ever. I wouldn't mind being a para if only I had a normal bladder and bowel - not that I mind being a para!!

I don't have full control of my bladder. I can feel it when I need to use the toilet, but I just can't hold it in for longer than 30 minutes.

I don't normally have accidents - if you know what I mean!! That's because, when I know I'm going to a place where I won't be able to go to the loo every few hours (sometimes it's seven minutes - depending on the amount of liquid I've drunk), I make sure I wear a TENA PAD - the small ones in the blue bag. It looks and feels like normal women's pads so I don't have to feel embarrassed if a friend that doesn't understand my situation sees it. They will simply think I'm on my period. I think every woman with bladder problems should use it - and it fits into a small handbag.

I'm sexually active and have a normal sex life. I always pray for me not to have an accident while I'm with my partner. Since none of my partners had disabilities it would have been so embarrassing if that happened.

Last week I was at an ex-boyfriend's place for a sleep over (Yes! We are friends now!). I was tired of sitting because of the long trip and needed to rest in bed. I could feel my bladder was full but I thought I'd rest for just a few minutes before I would empty it. What I didn't expect was for my ex to join me on the bed and start tickling me! He was on top of me playing and tickling me, I'm quite weak and I can't put up any resistance, so I started laughing - a lot! As you know, laughing when your bladder's full can easily cause an accident, plus his body weight was heavy and put pressure on my abdomen. I could feel my bladder bursting so I told him to stop because I needed to pee - but he thought I was joking and told me to go ahead and use the bed! I didn't mean to but I just couldn't hold it any longer and it happened right there on the bed ...

I felt so embarrassed when he said "O.M.G. you were serious!" We both kept on laughing but my laughter started to fade. He realized I felt bad and reassured me and told me not to worry. He removed the wet bedding, placed a fresh towel over the wet spot and carried on as if nothing had happened. It could have been the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to me - but it felt okay because he understood.

ri-dot