“You are too loud mouthed for someone who is disabled”

Yes, I speak my mind, I am a woman, I know my worth and I will stand firm by my values and principles. As I uttered those words, I was attacked by a response that said that I was self-absorbed. I asked myself, is it a bad thing? Little did I know that I just struck a chord.

All of you must be familiar with the following: women who never know when to shut up, they whine, moan and whimper over everything. I chuckle every time I hear this and ask myself, who in their right mind would invest so much energy and risk getting a wrinkled face over nothing.? Whinging and complaining only damages the soul, the mind and most importantly for a woman, the face. So why do it?

This got me thinking of the types of women ] in our midst and I have identified three very specific personalities.

Firstly, we have the noise makers. They talk just for the sake of talking and give all women the label that we complain without reason. Secondly, you get the ‘Quiet - I know my worth, keep it together’ type of women who are belive that women should be seen and not be heard, especially where their parners are concerned. These women are intelligent, they are simply afraid of letting their voice be heard and choose to live in the shadow of others. The third type is ‘too smart for her own good’. She speaks her mind, she is opinionated and well-informed. She believes in fairness, looking for solutions, learning and living in harmony.

I respect all these type of women. However, my focus here is on the third type of woman. I’ll tell you why.

I am that type of a woman, I speak my mind, I am not always right, but please allow me to speak so that I can heard and let me be willing to learn from your response? Sadly, sometimes my type of women are perceived as arrogant, miss-know-it-all and sanctimonious. This is a misconception which I challenge from time to time. I am not smug, but I simply state the world as I see it. Usually, when a woman speaks her mind she is faced with negativity from the opposite sex, or even from other women. This has sort of become a norm in our society which I do not believe should be the case.

You are probably wondering where I am headed with this discussion. Let me tell you. It gets worse, when you are a this type of a woman and you have a disability. My opinionated-self has come across comments like “You are too loud-mouthed for someone who is disabled!” and “How do you become so arrogant while sitting in a wheelchair?”. Do you wonder what my response was? At those moments, my entire being wanted to pull the ‘MissThang’ attitude and snap my fingers, while spitting fire but I realised that this was my opportunity to set the record straight and educate.
I am a women and my disability does not set my boundaries and limitations. I am confident, proud and I appreciate my astuteness. Attitudinal barriers will never end as long as we allow our disabilities to limit who we are.

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